Thursday, August 25, 2011

*le small talk*

Last week my mentor said, ‘There is nothing small about small talk’.

 I agree, small talk is neither small nor a talk which can be transcribed. It is the ‘what did you do during the weekend’ conversation on Monday and ‘what are you weekend plans’ on Friday.  Some people who lack souls do it very well, while the rest of the socially awkward people suck at it. 

 An image is worth a thousand words. Yes it is, hence it should not be used in a small talk as the talk will no longer be small. This simple logic eludes people who are too lazy to talk but want to convey roughly 1000 words to the other person as a small talk in a very small duration. And they end up in awkward situations with an audience to judge.

Why did I write this? I don’t follow cricket (there, I said it), I don’t watch twilight movies, I don’t listen to plethora of bands, I am not a gourmet, I don’t watch cat videos, I don’t follow celebrities on twitter (except for Charlie Sheen), I don’t have any motorcycle diary, I don’t have a distant cousin whose neighbor is an extra in some bollywood movie, I don’t try to lose my weight, I don’t write often,  I don’t install too many apps on my phone, I don’t drink variants of ethyl alcohol, I don’t read international bestsellers, I don’t share playlists, I am not quite oberservant of the climate, I don’t have a friend who died of cancer (Terrance survived), I don’t have an imaginary friend who died of cancer. 

So when it comes to small talk, I am no good than the AI programs like Cleverbot and miss out on potential opportunities which give less/ no input during the small talk. 

It sucks.

It really really sucks.

It sucks more than the emptiness of life of the most popular guy of your college.